An
Agreement to not force sharing and/or other behaviors…
At The Wonder Studio, we believe in offering children a time
and a place to practice social skills, independence, and self-regulation.
In our commitment to Wonder Studio as a place where children
can feel empowered and creative, we ask that parents and caregivers take a step
back and take advantage of this time and space as an opportunity to learn from
and about your child(ren).
Our goal as teachers, is to create a united front among our
Wonder Studio communities to trust our children and their beautiful human
instinct to engage socially with others. Young children’s social interactions
will look very different from an adult’s social interactions.
As caregivers, we understand that our young children, will
benefit from making social mistakes. We will step in (when possible) to physically
prevent hitting, biting, pushing, scratching, (putting your body/hand/arm
between the children with the language, “I will not let you hit/scratch/bite
Johnny.” but otherwise, will offer the following guidance for young children:
1.
A non-judgmental attitude including not labeling children
as mean, not nice, bossy, shy, push-over, etc..
2.
Confidence and understanding that the child(ren)
has a right to choose his/her level of social engagement.
3.
Narrate or “sportscast” the experience of the
child(ren) when social problem-solving is happening.
4.
Emotional “coaching” …”do you need a hug?” “it
looks like you are frustrated.” “he looks sad that you took the ball from him.”
5.
Time and space to reflect in isolation (not
time-out). Sitting with a child outside away from the group to decrease the
sensory stimuli and to gain perspective is beneficial but please do not use as
a punishment.
6.
Encourage and offer Language (including body
language and sign language) as a tool for the child(ren). In the heat of the
moment, children often forget which words/actions can help and/or don’t
understand the utterances of their studio mates.
“You can tell Johnny, No.” “Hold out your
hand and say, “Can I have the ball?” “Now we wait and see.” “Johnny is shaking
his head and saying, “No.” “Would you like to sit here and wait for your turn
or would you like to go and do something else while you wait?”
The teachers at The Wonder Studio understand that the adults
in the room are able to Problem-solve and regulate children’s behaviors
(through time-outs, punishments, timers, labeling, bribing, and forcing
social/cognitive behaviors as well as forcing kids to apologize).
However, we are instead choosing to consciously practice a
mindfulness that allows the child a time and space to practice SELF-regulation.
We understand that this means the child will make mistakes but we are choosing
to value those mistakes as opportunities for learning.
Thank you.
Shannon Lipan and The Wonder Studio teachers.
A blog and Video to describe our agreement. The link below takes you to our YouTube channel with a specific video on Not Sharing. Then you can read some reflections in the link following.
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