I remember reading that Eric Clapton has to schedule time at
his music studio to be creative, or else it just doesn’t happen for him. I thought that when you are a creative
genius, creativity just uncontrollably oozes out of you at all times. But it isn’t so: you have to make time for
yourself to be creative.
We are all creative.
Every last one of us. And we need
to be creative. We deserve to be
creative. Some of us listen to that need
more than others. Why? What is so important about creativity? Well, for one, it makes us engage in
divergent thinking instead of convergent thinking.
Most of the time, we are engaged in convergent thinking: we
start with several ideas and whittle them down into one idea. With divergent thinking, we are doing the
opposite. We are starting with one idea
and expanding that one into as many ideas that we can. This shift in thinking helps us to be
flexible, original, innovative, and offers us a new perspective. It also forces us to use our imagination.
A friend recently heard someone say, “You can live a life
without creativity; it is possible.” That
thought made my friend cry. I would
argue that you can not; you should not. But that is where a lot of us are
headed leading such busy, over-scheduled lives.
The magazine Psychology
Today researched “Everyday Creativity,” and found outstanding
benefits. Did you know that…
It helps people to adapt and thrive,
It improves their immune functioning (it’s flu season
people!),
It helps them cope with aging,
It teaches resilience,
It improves relationships,
AND…
It gives people a greater sense of well-being and personal
growth.
WE NEED CREATIVITY TO LIVE FULLY.
But, where is the time and the space to make that happen? At Wonder Studio, of course! But I am always looking to expand that one hour
of open-ended, uninterrupted, no-expectation creative time to our lives at
home. It is so important to mental
health, but we have to make it easy and realistic, or it won’t happen.
So, how do we do it? Here is an easy idea. Every year, at the beginning of February, I
get a fold out table out of our garage and put it smack dab into our
office/music room. It doesn’t fit very
well, and it’s an eye sore, but it stays up for at least two weeks
(gasp!). I fill it with art materials: fabric,
yarn needles, stickers, papers, old magazines, scissors, glue, cold glue guns,
old red tissue paper from the holidays, recyclables – you name it, it’s on the
table.
My family comes and goes as we are inspired to create or as
we are thinking about someone, and we use the table to create class, family,
and friend valentines. As we move
through the table we think:
What do I find interesting…
What if…
How does this work together…
Who does this remind me of…
I know that it is super easy to grab that pre-made,
commercial Valentine that all the classmates have heard about, and I do love
the store-bought variety. My son and I
found army guys that said, “Love is a Battlefield,” which spawned a great
conversation about Pat Benatar and 80’s music and ended at “Greased Lightning”
(don’t ask). But I dare say, that is not
the point of this holiday. You may argue
that it is a commercialized, contrived, hoax of a holiday, but I am going to
argue that the point of Valentine’s Day is the authentic expression of love for
others. Which is something that we
really need right now in our society.
The authentic
expression of love for others.
By providing the art materials and the free time with this
“Valentine’s Table,” I expect my kids (and myself) to be creative. I expect
them to create heart-felt, original art that expresses their true feelings for
another person. Over these two weeks, I
watch and hear my kids evaluate their relationships with each of their
classmates. They think about who those
people really are, what their passions are, and how they appreciate their
personalities being in their lives. They
also learn how to take these themes and move them into a visual, physical form
of self-expression. They engage in a very
sophisticated form of thought. Even
though their products may not look that sophisticated.
This self-expression comes easy with their close
friends. But more poignant is when they
have to make a Valentine for someone who they perceive to be mean or who they
don’t connect with.
My son experienced this with a girl in his class. After an in-depth discussion about bossiness,
he realized that he didn’t really know much about her. So, he asked his best friend (who has a crush
on her – Shhh!) why she is so great. He
found out that she plays football with her older brother, and she loves FSU and
ducks. He was so inspired by how much
they have in common, that he wrote her a poem:
Which was almost as good as his “Baseballs are blue and
helmets are hard,” poem that he then made after that.
This would have never happened if I would have caved and
bought the packaged Valentine from the store.
It SURELY would not have happened if I got on Pinterest with
the kids and picked out a handmade Valentine craft to make. End products disrupt the creative process and
lead us away from authentic self-expression.
(Think convergent verses divergent). I know it is hard; I love Pinterest
too.
Be authentic. Be
original.
Our children must hear this and see this from us. It must be our expectation of them. Do you
know what else they need to hear?
Be Vulnerable.
When Valentine’s Day comes and it is time to pass cards out,
my kids are so excited to share what they have worked so hard on. But they are also nervous, usually about the
ones they are giving to kids that they don’t feel close to. There is a hesitation when wondering how
their creativity and art will be received.
Sometimes, there is even panic.
Is it good enough?
Am I good enough?
Did I risk too much?
Vulnerability is a fast track to personal growth. Teaching our kids to “show up” and “put
themselves out there” will help them to be brave and to take risks in all areas
of life. From personal relationships and
careers to being a colleague that is easy to work with, vulnerability and
creativity work well for people.
Originality
Self-expression
Risk-taking
Intelligence
Autonomy
Collaboration
Imagination
This is what you improve for your family when
you allow them time and space to create.
It allows us to become more informed versions of ourselves while helping
us connect with others and the world around us.
My family (all 5 of us) found ourselves at the kitchen table
a few nights ago doing our Valentines together.
I don’t know how we all got there – the materials were available and we
were available, so it happened. We sat
around for almost two hours creating together.
We laughed, heard stories about each other’s daily lives, were inspired
by each other’s art, and challenged our artistic capabilities. There might have even been a few unicorns and
rainbows.
This beautiful space eventually dissolved into an argument
about toothpaste and who is going to go first, but in those couple of hours, I
so deeply felt how great we all are together, how cool my kids are, and why
Brian and I started this crazy, exhausting adventure of having a family.
For love.
